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An agunah caught, twisting in the bonds
Bonds not of sin and crime
Simply a mistake purchased
At the beckoning of youth’s innocence
And once more arguing, pleading
With your Judge
To grant you relief,
Unravel you from the twisted ropes.
Rivers of days upon days have flowed forth,
Spilling over into
Falls,
Gorges of agony,
Canyons of infinite depth
Have etched
Crushed
Trampled and
Gashed
The eternity of your soul.
No sweated effort
To find a cure for your case.
~Written by R., an agunah for 18 years.
A mesurevet get or agunah is a Jewish woman married to a Jewish man and faced with one of the following situations:
- She has been fighting her husband in the courts for a year or longer to obtain a get (Jewish bill of divorce), which her husband refuses to grant.
- Her husband demands certain provisions or conditions that are outside the standard bounds of the law.
- The established bet din ( Jewish court of law) ruled in her favour and declared that her husband must grant her a divorce, which he refuses to do.
- Her husband is deceased, and the required approval for extrication from her marriage is pending or not forthcoming, for whatever reason.
This dead-end, destructive reality is daily existence for many Israeli women. The essence of the problem is the Halachic (code of Jewish law) point of view, which grants the husband the right to refuse his wife’s request for a divorce. In its practical application, the law prevents women from ending their marriages if their husbands are missing or refuse to grant a divorce, even when justifiable grounds exist.
This situation of being trapped in an unwanted marriage is asymmetrical. The wife cannot clear herself a new path in life, remarry, or establish a new family without any newly begotten children being considered mamzerim – bastards – in the eyes of the Halacha. Furthermore, if the wife is forced to wait for an extended period of time, she faces another pressing concern: She is caught in a race against her biological clock. Her fertile years are limited, and the day will inevitably arrive when she will no longer be able to bear children. It is clear why many women are forced to relinquish rights to child support, property, and sometimes even child custody in the desperate attempt to obtain a get.
